Our 10 Simple Rules For Drinking At A Bar

10. Barney Stinson said it best. Suit up. Well, maybe you don’t need a suit, but at least look the part of where you’re going. Ladies, we don’t need to give you any advice here.

9. If you can easily get to the bar, never double fist. How will you get that person’s number with your hands full champ?

8. If you can’t get to the bar easily, order a “citywide” (it’s beer and a shot for those of you not from Philly). That should tide you over.

7. If it’s not too busy try to learn the Bartender’s name. They’ll prioritize you because of the familiarity and you just made your first friend. Chances are the bartender knows most of the people at the bar so it’s a great way to meet others.

6. Don’t conquer the Jukebox. The whole bar will hate you if you roll up into a dive bar blasting punk and queue up $20 worth of country music. You can listen to what you want to, but don’t take away the opportunity for others to as well.

5. Dance your way through a crowd. People are more forgiving when you push them if you look like your dancing. Having difficulty dancing because you have the rhythm of wacky waving inflatable arm flailing guy? A simple double back tap followed by excuse me works better than the snow plow method.

4. Always ask first, don’t force the staff to keep you in line. “Is this seat taken?”, “Can we take our drinks outside?”, “Is there a minimum on cards?”

3. Be humble. Don’t walk in the place expecting a red carpet to be rolled out and everyone sing your praise. Nobody likes a hot shot, especially the locals.

2. Remember to tip a minimum $1 per drink/shot. Any mixed drinks $9+ get more than a dollar. Tipping well guarantees a faster rate of service.

1.  Leave the same way you got in–on your own two feet. Never get so wasted that you can’t control yourself.




Theodore Drnktobedne