“What the hell is that on the ground?” “Someones underwear.” “Oh okay.”

It’s Christmas day, well the day after Christmas, my watch reads 12:01. Some bar somewhere needs to be open. We drove around aimlessly, and then it happened. A faint yellow glow in the distance. As we drew closer, Santa Claus was out front of the bar getting punched in the head repeatedly by Anti-Claus. Cops were scattered about attempting to break up the scrap, while a few just laughed. Bingo. We found our place to go.

This was pure Christmas irony. Santa Claus just emptied our wallets, the poor bastard had it coming dressed like that. I felt bad for a minute, then I checked to see if he bled wrapping paper and snow. It was time to see what this place was all about.

We pushed our way inside, an unsettling smokey fog gripped the inside of the building. I looked up, the ceiling tiles were a stark tar covered brown. Even with a smoking ban this place leaks dive bar legacy. We had a few rounds, it was a laid back place. That’s a comfort. Hoodies, jeans, and a sea of black t-shirts as far as the eye can see. Everyone carefully eyed each other up like a brawl was going to begin any minute. I suddenly felt a little bad for Santa, he didn’t stand a chance in that bright red suit…

Addendum: 1/29/13 – It’s been a year since we’ve been here. My how things change. The ceiling tiles were all fresh and clean, AND the place was brightly lit. Don’t worry though; it’s the same old divey crowd you love.

The bottom line:

Hours:  11 a.m. – 2 a.m.
Crowd:  Divey
Music: Background
Price range:  $
Accepts Credit Cards:  Yes
Dance floor:  No
Outdoor area: No
Coat check: No

The place is small, but drinks are average priced at $3 to $8. The age range varies and they serve surprisingly good food. If you need a cheap beer or a place away from your regular drinking hole, this ones for you.

Guiseppi’s Restaurant-Cocktail
13 South Black Horse Pike, Mount Ephraim, NJ